Nguyen, Michelle. Californian native. 17. Aggie. Full-time student, part-time dreamer. This is an account of cupcakeisms straight from my red velvet heart. Writing is my release.

I hate these cliche proclamations:

1) “I’m not like the rest.” / “I’m different.”
2) “Nobody understands.” / “You don’t know how I feel.”
3) “My friends are better than yours.” / “My friends are the best.”

Okay, first of all .. when you say “I’m different” you’re really just repeating what millions of other people said. Yeah yeah, we’re all unique. But who in the world needs to point it out? And if you did, you’re not different. You’re a generic human being who thinks and feels the way other ignorant American teenagers with petty problems and their angst feels. Which leads me to number two: “Nobody understands.” Really. I have seen that written everywhere. No one understands me, no one knows what it is like … that’s bullshit. That’s all bullshit. No one knows what it’s like to what, be cheated on? Ask Brad Pitt. No one knows what it’s like to have a broken heart? Wake the fuck up and look at the person next to you. They’ve probably had their heart shattered into smithereens. They even make songs about these things, you know. No one knows what it’s like to lose a loved one? Honestly. It happens to everyone. Said Chuck Palahniuk “The only thing I know is everything you love will die. The first time you meet that someone special, you can count on them one day being dead and in the ground.” So grow the fuck up. Unless you’re in a third world country and are currently undergoing Chinese Water Torture, I can assure you you’re not feeling anything groundbreakingly new. Man up. And the third one, well there’s not exactly a total justification for this being on the list. I’m just feeling spiteful and anal retentive. And I just want to say this: If you haven’t been through hard times, I don’t mean hard he-broke-my-heart hard times, but hard my-house-burned-down-and-my-baby-sister-was-trapped-inside hard times, then your friends are NOT the best.

I need to lighten up. Palahniuk definitely had a negative effect on me.